Chapter 82

"So that's it, Jen? The day before prom and you dump me?"

"I'm sorry, Kevin - I wish I had a better explanation for you. But I don't."

"No, this is ridiculous. I spent $110 on the limo, another hundred on the tux, forty on your fricking flowers, thirty bucks on new gel for my hair, and don't even get me started on the hotel room in Chicago!"

"I'm sorry."

"You're sorry? That's all you have to say?"

"Yes."

"No, you're not sorry now, Jen. But you will be."

And with that, Kevin hung up.

Chapter 81

"...and then, after Kevin left and STILL wouldn't tell me what was wrong, Lance just avoided me for the rest of the day."

Jen looked up at her mother, who was standing next to the stove. Her mug of cocoa hat long since cooled, as Jen had delved into all of the details of her day. She had listened, questioning in the appropriate places, to the entire saga, with the same half-smile on her face.

"What do you think, Mom?"

"I think I'm glad I found your father."

"Gee, thanks for your help."

"Honey, you know we love you."

"I do, Mom. Can I ask you what you think of Kevin?"

"That's kind of blunt, Jennipher."

"It's just that - I don't know. I like him and all, but..."

"Worried about remembering him forever as your prom date?"

"Well...oh my goodness...I am."

Chapter 80

"Hey mom," Jen said, as she walked in her house. Her shirt smelled like the restaurant and she couldn't wait to get it off. Absently, she thumbed through the day's mail - nothing special. She heard her mom in the kitchen, putting away the supplies from her nightly cup of cocoa.

"Hi honey. How was work?"

"Ugh."

"That bad, huh?" A knowing smile.

"Why are boys so dumb?"

Another knowing smile. "Tell me about your day."

Chapter 79

Blake took off through the trees, stumbling on tree roots and discarded cans. Branches lashed at his face, his shoulder crashing into one old oak tree hard enough to send shivers all the way down into his fingers. He heard Humbot behind him, gaining. Not knowing what the problem was only made the situation worse.

Chapter 78

Blake woke up on a warm patch of grass. He sat up slowly, effects of the Official Sleep Pill wearing off more rapidly than commercial pills. Light filtered through the trees, and a gentle breeze played across this face. His entry point was unstable - that much was obvious from where he sat.

He took a deep breath and immediately went into a coughing fit. As his body struggled to regain control, his mind raced - was the air here poisonous? And what was that smell?

As he finally regained his breath, a crashing in the undergrowth took it away again.

"Humbot?"

"Blake Blakesly! Is that you?"

"Yeah. I'm-"

"No time! We have to hide!"

Chapter 77

Stares-at-the-Sun had been out for days. During the day, he patiently studied the sky, living up to his name by staring at the sun for hours at a time. During the night, he rested, found what food and water there was to be found, and considered all he had seen during the day. Great things were in motion. Terrible things were in motion. The world was at an intersection, and he could see much. But not all. And that is why he stared at the sun.

Chapter 76

Gar was sitting on the step in front of the tux shop when Steve returned.

"Stupid cummerbunds," was his greeting.

"Yeah. Let me tell you what just happened." And Steve relayed the whole thing, starting with the apparently-injured old man and ending with Kevin's jerkiness.

"Does this guy think he's a Lifetime movie bad guy?"

"That's what I'm saying. 'Stay away from Jen.' Doesn't he realize that only makes it more likely that I won't?"

"Yeah, he's an idiot all right. Come on, I got my tux fixed. Let's go - I still have half an essay to write."

"Ah yes - The Foundation for the Foundation: A foundational report brought to you by the Gar Foundation. Catchy title."

"I'm hoping it counts toward my word total."

Chapter 75

"I'm sorry," Steve said, "did you just tell me to stay the hell away from Jen?"

"Yes, I did," Kevin responded, "and did you have something to say back?"

Steve paused, thoughts of his recent fight with Christian flashing in his mind. He had read somewhere that no one ever started a fight they thought they would lose - and while he really, really wanted to punch Kevin - he wasn't going to fight Kevin here.

But in the future...

"Steve? Did you want to say something?" There was just a hint of condescension in Kevin's voice now.

"Listen, Kevin. I don't know what you're talking about. With Jen, it's...it's complicated. Sure, I think she's pretty...but she's dating you. And I respect that..."

"Damn right you respect that!"

"...even if I have no respect for you. And think you're a jerk. And a terrible person. And...well, you get the point."

"Whatever, dude."

"Laters." Steve turned to walk back to the tux shop, half-expecting to feel a rock or something hit him in the back of the head, but no. Nothing. Just a ball of fury in the pit of his stomach that grew as he walked back to meet Gar.

Chapter 74

"All right, Mr. Blakesly, you're going to feel a sharp prick in a second - "

"What kind of shot is this?" Blake joked feebly.

"- and when you wake up, you'll have gone through."

Chapter 73

"Hey...Kevin? Is it?" Steve knew full well what the jerky jerk's name was.

"Yeah. Steve?"

"So, visiting Jen, or just grabbing some 'za?" Steve paused, wondering if he had just referred to pizza as 'za.

"No, I stopped by to see her, but she got into a big argument with a coworker. I could tell she didn't want to talk about it, so I'm splitting."

"Oh?" Steve said, thinking that a supportive boyfriend would stay with her through this alleged big argument.

"Yeah. I mean, I know a supportive boyfriend would stay, but I do plan to call her later and see how she's doing. I'm not a complete jerk." Kevin smiled.

"Yeah, I saw a guy who looked like he was hurt, so I came down here. My buddy's back at the tux shop getting his cummerbund arranged or something."

"What happened?"

"The cummerbund was too small."

"No," Kevin laughed again. Who did this guy think he was? Laughy McLaugherton? "What happened with the guy here?"

"Oh - sorry. Yeah, he got picked up and drove away. I guess something's taking care of him."

"Good, I guess."

There was a moment of silence so long it could have been packaged and sold. Awkward turtles crawled around awkward turkeys on the Awkward Farm. It was rough. Finally, Steve spoke up.

"See ya, man."

"Yeah - and Steve?"

"Yeah?"

"Stay the hell away from Jen."

Chapter 72

As Steve stared in the general direction of Alligretti's, thinking, of course, of Jennipher Semmes, he noticed someone walking out of the treeline next to the restaurant. The man (it had to be a man, didn't it?) was limping and clutching his chest. It seemed he was angry about something. Instinctively, Steve took two steps forward, but halted, remembering Gar in the tux shop.

He ducked into the shop, signaled Gar over, and told him he'd be right back. Quickly, Steve went back outside, only to see the mysterious man - now wearing a black fedora to match his black trenchcoat - hail a car and climb inside. Concerned for the man's safety, Steve started toward the car. Before he got close, the car carefully turned out of the parking lot and headed off down the street. Steve found himself alone in Alligretti's parking lot, feeling foolish for thinking this man was in any trouble at all.

"Hey, man."

Shocked by the sound of a voice, Steve turned. Oh frick...it was Kevin, Jen's friggin' boyfriend.

Chapter 71

Gar was taking forver inside the tux shop. Just two days before the prom, he had tried on his tux only to find that the cummerbund didn't fit properly. Incensed, he had raged at the clerk (failing to hear his reassurances that they would make a small adjustment and everything would be fine) until Steve got so fed up he left.

Now outside in the warm spring air, Steve examined his surroundings. To his left - traffic coming down the busy road. Across the street, trees blocked his view of the pricey houses. To his right - best not to think of that now. Steve took out his phone, paging through his contacts to see if he could call anyone to kill time with for five minutes.

Inextricably, though, his eyes were drawn to his right. Alligretti's sign lights came on as he did, whether through divine providence or divine comedy, he didn't know.

Chapter 70

"Why am I dating Kevin instead of you? Well, for starters, he asked!"

"So you would have gone out with me if I had asked?"

"Lance, it's not like that -"

Lance's face was beet-red, and, despite the chilly temperature of the walk-in cooler, he was sweating.

"It's always like that! Guys like me-"

"Listen, Lance. You can stand in here and yell at me all day, but the fact of the matter is this," Jen said, "all of this started because I noticed a change in your voice. I didn't think that was normal, so I asked. I was concerned. But what isn't normal is you acting like a jerk. You're better than this." She stopped for breath, then abruptly said "I need to get back to work."

She left Lance in the cooler, alone with his thoughts.

Chapter 69

After taking a deep breath to calm herself, Jen headed back into the restaurant. Torn between retunring to Kevin (which she wanted to do) and comforting Lance (which she felt she had to do), she mentally flipped a coin and went to find Lance.

"What happened to Lance?" one of the cooks asked, "He came storming in here and went into the walk-in."

Jen mumbled something about how she didn't know and headed in behind Lance.

The walk-in cooler was cold, as one would expect. The floor was filthy, with years of shredded cheese and dirt matted into a kind of perma-crud. Kegs of beer and tubs of cheese lined the left wall. Racks of balled dough and sliced beef occupied most of the right; the back wall was blocked by Lance, who faced away, shoulders shaking.

"Lance, I'm - I'm sorry."

"Is that all you think of me? Just a fat kid who lisps?" he asked, without turning around.

"No! That's not it at all! It's just that you used to lisp and now you don't. I noticed it. That's all!"

"So I'm just a fat kid who used to lisp?"

"No! Lance, you are a sweet guy who works hard and takes care of his friends. You're fun to be around and smart, too."

"So why are you dating Kevin and not me?"

Chapter 68

When nothing had happened for several minutes, Jennipher got nervous. She considered getting Kevin to reassure her (although what form THAT would take kind of embarrassed her), but finally went outside. Lance was standing just outside the door, facing the woods behind the parking lot.

"Lance? What happened?"

"Oh, hey Jen. I set it down, it scratched me - just a little - and kind of half-scampered off into traffic, dragging one if its back legs."

"Not into the woods?" Jen was puzzled. Wild animals usually ran away from civilization, didn't they?

"No. I think it was scared or something. I didn't see what happened when it ran into the street, but I didn't hear anything or see any cars swerve - I think it made it across the street."

"Lance?"

"Yeah?"

"Your lisp - it's gone. Has that ever happened?"

The look that crossed Lance's face demonstrated so much hurt Jen felt stunned by it. He turned wordlessly and stalked back into the restaurant, slamming the door behind him. Jen hurried to catch up.

Chapter 67

Jennipher was flattered. She had never considered herself particularly kind, or intelligent, or beautiful - it always amazed her when others complimented her on something like that.

"Okay, I'll take a look," she said, leaning over the cart.

Immediately she wished she hadn't. Instead of the hairy rat she expected, this one was much slimmer than she expected. The hair could best be described as "patchy" and looked like the rat had seen better days. The trap was holding it pinned down, its paws feebly scratching at nothing. This trap didn't appear to be the first to catch this creature, as scars crisscrossed its body, forming a weird symbol that looked like it belonged tattooed on a jock's bicep.

"It's suffering!" Jen said, horrified.

"Yeah, that'th why we got you. What should we do?"

"Take it outside. Set it free. If it runs off, let it go. If it struggles...it might be kinder to kill it." Jen heard herself saying the words and didn't believe it.

"I got it," Lance said. He reached down and gingerly picked up the whole trap, sickly rat-creature and all. Holding it at full arms' length, he walked out the back door. Jen shut her eyes and listened for the THUMP! that would end the rat's life.

Several minutes passed.

Chapter 66

The area around the dough baller was normally covered with flour. Unused pizza pans sat on the bottom shelves of the stainless-steel tables, with just a hint of disuse on them (although the night before they had, in fact, been used repeatedly for teh weekend rush). A small cart had been wheeled out and the cooks and busboys were standing around it, peering behind.

"Guyth! I brough Jen!"

"What's up?"

"We caught a rat!" Ben exclaimed. He was hopping gleefully back and forth from one foot to another, as though catching a rat were the equivalent of winning a game of "Trivial Pursuit."

"That's gross! Lance, why would you bring me back here for this?"

"It'th juth that...will you take a look at it?"

"No!"

"It's not dead!" one of the cooks said. "We were waiting for you to tell us how to handle it."

"Get it out of here!" Jen was horrified.

"Right - but should we just kill it now - which Ben's in favor of - or do we let it go, knowing that in its wounded state it probably won't survive very long?"

"Why on earth would you ask me?"

The other workers looked at each other.

"Because you're the kindest person we know."

Chapter 65

Work was slow for a Sunday afternoon. Jen was alone in her favorite booth, trying to finish some pre-calc homework (and resisting the urge to ask Lance to do it for her). As she chewed her pencil's eraser and stared at the calculator, willing it to find the correct answer, someone slipped into the booth across from her.

"Kevin!"

"Hey. I knew you'd be bored at work today, so I thought I'd drop by to say hello."

Pre-calculus momentarily forgotten, Jennipher laughed at the sheer joy of having someone who would stop by just to keep her from getting bored. He could be out at the beach or off with his friends, but no - he chose to spend time with her.

"What's so funny?"

"Shouldn't you be at the beach or something?"

"The only reason I ever wanted to go to the beach was to look at girls. And the only girl worth looking at is working at Alligretti's. So I came here."

Wow, Jen thought, he's good.

Oblivious to the moment, the world continued. Lance approached their table, obviously excited.

"Hey Kevin. Jen! Gueth what we just found in the back! Here'th a hint: it got caught in the trap we left behind the dough baller!"

"Lance - is this the sort of thing you should be talking about in the dining room?"

"Oh. No, I gueth not. But you should thee it!"

Jen sighed. "I'll be right back, Kevin."

"Take your time. I'll be here, looking for something rodent-free on your menu." He smiled.

Oh, I am so smitten, Jen thought. This could be a problem.

Chapter 64

POLICE REPORT ARRESTS IN FLOWER GARDENS "INCREASING"

Flower Gardens, a popular park by day, transforms itself by night. Gone are the laughing children, the watchful parents. In their place are amorous teenagers, taking advantges of the seclusion of the area to pursue romantic interludes.

One twentysomething resident, who asked not to be identified by name, said that his high school class had begun calling the area "Deflower Gardens."

Lewd conduct arrests are up from last year's record high. Police put the increasing numbers down to increased police presence in the area.

Beverly Bogner, whose property abuts Flower Gardens, said, "I don't know how much difference the police have really made. It's kind of a joke in the area about what goes on up there. But I have a daughter, and she knows well enough to not go up there after dark - especially with a boy."

Chapter 63

Blake was stunned. To be spared death at this moment, by the Reverend-General herself...strange things were afoot. But an unlikely mission at least gave him a chance to escape a shameful execution...

"I'll do it."

Chapter 62

"...and I wouldn't get his cap. That was it."

"Mr. Blakesly, you know that disregarding an order from an officer of the Holy Army is considered heresy, correct?"

"Yes, your Leadershipness."

"And you are aware that the penalty for heresy is death, correct?"

"Yes."

"In addition, you breached security at my palace, entering my private chambers."

"That's correct." By now Blake could feel the axe at the back of his neck.

"And finally, you drank my personal supply of holy water, slaking your earthly thirst with Eternal Water."

"Yes."

Blake waited for the swish of the axe. Briefly, he wondered how long it would hurt before his brain stopped sending and receiving signals for good. Seconds swum by, and Blake finally peeked out of the corner of his eye.

The guards, apparently as silent in movement as in speech, had left the room. He and Humbot were alone with the Reverend-General.

"Do you want to die, Mr. Blakesly?"

"N-No, your Leadershipness."

"Then I have a mission for you."

Chapter 61

The Reverend-General was terrible and beautiful. She stood a shade over 2 meters tall, her flesh quivering at over 200 kilograms. Pasty-white skin jiggled as she moved, somehow maintaining an aura of majesty. She was naked, of course - clothing only got between the individual and God. (The idea of a nonholy person - much less a Heretic - being naked was revolting, even to Blake. As such, he had showered in his clothes for his entire stay at Sharpin.)

Her hair was set upon her head in the intricacies affected only by the wealthy. As God's steward on Earth, riches were at her command, and it appeared she had taken full advantage of that. Her throne was ornate, elaborate carvings and gems competing for the attention of the lucky viewer. She crossed behind Blake and Humbot, sneering as she did.

Nothing had been said since her comment upon arrival, and the only sounds in the room came from her movement to the throne. As she settled into it, shifting her massive body into a comfortable position, Blake willfully calmed himself down.

"You're the heretic and the android that escaped from Sharpin, aren't you." It was not a question.

"Yes, your Leadershipness."

"Describe your heresy to me."

"I beg your pardon?"

"I'll tell you when to beg!" her voice thundered. "Tell me about your heresy! How did it happen?! What were the circumstances leading up to it? And how did this infernal android come to be involved?"

"I'm not infernal," Humbot robosulked.

Chapter 60

The stone floor of the throne room was extra-hard against Blake's knees. He and Humbot had been trussed like actual animals and held awaiting the Reverend-General. Their only company were two heavily armed guards who, as per regulations, had gotten their tongues cut out as part of service to the Reverend-General.

The room was ornate, as befitting the majesty of the position of Reverend-General. Stained glass windows depicting the miracles performed by previous officeholders adorned the wall. For the more modern palate, synthesized re-enactements of miracles ran on continuous loops in the corners of the room. The ceiling, arched and appropriately gabled (due to advances in gable technology in the 23rd century) was hailed as an architectural marvel, a culmination of centuries of human knowledge and, it was said, divine inspiration.

Relics from previous leaders rested on short marble columns around the room. Locks of hair, finger bones, and even teeth from the long line of distinguished rulers were on display for those few summoned to the throne room for social events. As for those summoned for other reasons...less could be said.

"I can't believe you brought us up into the Reverend General's palace," Blake said from the side of his mouth.

"Blake, I recommend you stop talking. This room has perfect acoustics," Humbot responded.

"Oh, because by talking we're going to get into MORE trouble?"

"That's entirely possible," boomed a voice from behind them.

It was the Reverend-General.